Cervical Chat: Redefining Resilience and Empowering Survivors Facing Recurrence

00:00:00:00 - 00:00:14:23
Unknown
Hello and welcome to our Circle Chat on Redefining Resilience and Empowering Survivors Facing recurrence. McClellan I'm the Cervical Cancer Program coordinator at Share. Please share in the comments. Will you be joining from today?

00:00:15:01 - 00:00:43:04
Unknown
Before we begin, I'd like to share a little bit about share. Share is a national nonprofit that supports, educates and empowers anyone who's been diagnosed with breast or gynecologic cancers and provides outreach to the general public about signs and symptoms because no one should have to face breast, ovarian, uterine, cervical or metastatic breast cancer alone. For more information about upcoming webinars and support groups and our help helplines, please visit our website at Share Cancer Support.

00:00:43:06 - 00:01:08:11
Unknown
Feel free to submit any questions in the comments. Remember that we are unable to give specific medical advice, so please keep your questions general in nature. And now I'd like to hand it over to today's guest, Lynda Ryan, who will introduce herself. Hi everyone. I'm Ryan. I'm a recurrent story. I originally diagnosed in two four and have had six.

00:01:08:13 - 00:01:26:13
Unknown
And then I've been on three clinical trials, numerous different therapies. And thank you for inviting me to be here today.

00:01:26:15 - 00:02:03:20
Unknown
okay. I probably could share a little more. Yeah. If you don't mind just telling us a little bit about your story and just however much or little you'd like to say. Okay, So I was originally diagnosed in 2004, as I said, and the treatment was a hysterectomy. Me And it was actually stage zero, which, you know, I think that would be the same treatment today, seven years after being originally diagnosed, I really had thought I had cancer on my list, but I found an enlarged lymph node in my super, super aklavik lymph node on the right side.

00:02:03:22 - 00:02:29:14
Unknown
And that was the indication that my cervical cancer was back in actually the lymph nodes throughout my body and in my groin area. So I had the option to do standard of care chemotherapy or go on a trial. And I went on a clinical trial. And the trial, I didn't really know anything about trials and thankfully my doctor offered it to me.

00:02:29:14 - 00:02:56:04
Unknown
But there were 54 women on the trial. There was a 31% response rate. 17 people responded. That would be 31% and 16 had a partial response and I had a complete response. So I was the only one on the trial. And it it didn't go to a Phase three trial, but it was at that point that I knew how important science and research was.

00:02:56:06 - 00:03:25:08
Unknown
So that was I did eight rounds of chemotherapy, no evidence of disease, and then four years later, I had another recurrence, Two years later had another recurrence, did a trial, responded, stopped responding, went on another trial, responded, stopped responding, and then went on to Avastin, which a lot of people are on bevacizumab. So that kept my disease stable for two years.

00:03:25:08 - 00:03:51:19
Unknown
And then I had another recurrence in September 2021, and that was pretty significant. I had few surgeries and then I did ten rounds of chemo and 30 rounds of radiation after, and I'd already done lots of those things before too. So. So in a nutshell, that's kind of my journey. Wow, what a what a journey. And so you're your first.

00:03:51:21 - 00:04:21:19
Unknown
So when did you start? When did you first get your first diagnosis again? Thousand for 20 years. 20 years. Wow, wow, wow. And so now you're just on. KEYTRUDA. So I'm like, okay, And that's the year I'll be done with that at the end of this year. It's all planned. Yeah. good. Yeah. Awesome. Well, I'm so glad you're here with us today.

00:04:21:21 - 00:05:00:20
Unknown
And yeah, very excited. So you all know me. I'm the cervical cancer program coordinator at Share, and I had a metastatic cervical cancer diagnosis in 2016, and I have been in remission since 2017. But I still deal with fear of recurrence all the time. I'd like to say it. It's a little easier, but it doesn't really. But maybe eventually, I don't know.

00:05:00:20 - 00:05:29:09
Unknown
We'll see. But I guess we'll just go ahead and dive in to our questions. So we have a few so far and actually, I'll go ahead. We just had one question submitted live, so why don't I go ahead and jump into that one first. So can you talk more about your experience with the clinical trials? Do you have any advice to people who are afraid to try clinical trials?

00:05:29:11 - 00:05:54:23
Unknown
Yes, I would encourage everyone to inquire and talk to their doctor about clinical trials. Like I said, I've been on three and I probably wouldn't be sick for today if I weren't if I been on those trials and my doctor hadn't suggested them. And it's really important. I was never afraid. And people used to tell me, You're so brave for doing this because it will help other people.

00:05:54:23 - 00:06:23:02
Unknown
And quite honestly, I was doing it for selfish reasons. I knew those were the latest and greatest drugs that were being tested and I felt like to have access to those was cutting edge. That was a gift to be able to have access to some of those that if they had seen, you know, responses to so what ever been on a one trial plan.

00:06:23:04 - 00:06:52:19
Unknown
I would do that because it's a dose escalation thing but I, I think trials are really important and if you think the science makes sense, investigate it more. Talk about it with your doctor. Yeah, for sure. For sure. Were you ever nervous about trying a trial? No. In in fact, every I've had a recurrence, I actually look for the trials and talk to my family unit.

00:06:52:21 - 00:07:19:23
Unknown
Our and it was the first time I was actually on standard of care. I've done burpees through the trials before, but this 2021, that was the first time I was ever on standard of care chemotherapy. So I've never been nervous about it. And I just I want to talk about something that you mentioned, like does it get easier about your work is and worrying about it and after sex?

00:07:19:23 - 00:07:53:21
Unknown
You know, I don't worry about it anymore because if I don't want it to happen but there's I don't think right now I think I'm done. So maybe are too. I would have said like there's a good chance it could happen again. But sometimes when I share my story and I'll tell the the chronological order of it, what you say is that, you know, on X day, the day that all cancer patients dread but also anticipate happened, and that was when I was having a recurrence.

00:07:53:21 - 00:08:20:13
Unknown
You know, like we all dread that happening, but we're all like kind of waiting for it to happen to. So not in an unhealthy way. But I think part of having a cancer diagnosis. Right, Right. True. And and, you know, I mean, that's a good point, too. I mean, I, I, I just get a bit anxious about it because honestly, like when I had my recurrence or I don't even know if I would call it a recurrence.

00:08:20:13 - 00:08:55:20
Unknown
But when I found out that my cancer spread, I, I wasn't even worried that day. It was like I just was like, okay, this is like easy peasy, just follow up. And so I was just like, you know, I'm flabbergasted that that happened. So. So now I'm like, I just feel like I can't get too comfortable. But I, but also, like, I find a little peace in the fact that, like, I just remember like this resident came in and and she told me that, like, as long as we can keep you here and keep you on some treatment, there's always going to be something new.

00:08:55:22 - 00:09:23:03
Unknown
And there's always, you know, there's always a chance. And so I don't know, I always kind of kind of stuck to that. And, you know, that just kind of stuck with me and when my I on my second recurrence. So I had done the first one and then it was it was difficult. Right. The treatment, though, my current recurrence, I can tell you from a baseball game with my son, he was like, I don't know, 12 or something at the time.

00:09:23:03 - 00:09:40:23
Unknown
And I felt this along kind of in a similar place to where it had or and so I didn't want my kids to know. And I went upstairs and I went in my closet and I literally called my friend hysterical. And she was the one who had been through treatments with me and she might even be on here.

00:09:40:23 - 00:10:01:17
Unknown
But my friend Barbara and I called her and I was like frantic. It was a Sunday. And she said, Linda, this is your life. Whatever it is, we will deal with it. And it was reality slapped that I needed because this was my life. What was getting in a closet, getting upset about it wasn't going to help. So let's deal with it.

00:10:01:17 - 00:10:28:00
Unknown
And so I think it's really normal. And I'm, you know, full disclosure, I get nervous before my scans, too. And I think that that's normal that we all do that. But this that this is my life now and I may have to deal with it. I don't deal with it back then. Yeah, yeah, yeah. you're awesome.

00:10:28:02 - 00:11:02:15
Unknown
Okay. So next question. How has your experience with cervical cancer recurrence shaped your understanding of resilience and empowerment? I don't know that it's I guess it's shaped it in a way that I've never been a like I need to kick cancer's book first. Like, I need to make sure I'm positive. It just always was natural for me. I really didn't think that I might be naive.

00:11:02:17 - 00:11:28:01
Unknown
So as far as resiliency, like there, there were things I would tell myself, and making my brain strong was really something that I learned through this process. And having a strong body created a strong mind for me, but like making sure if I did have a negative thought, I would just say the opposite in my head or try and figure out the positive side of that.

00:11:28:01 - 00:11:51:13
Unknown
You know, like the the side effects of chemo, They're horrible, right? They're not fun and whatever. But I used to think, okay, I'm having horrible side effects, but I'm happy about that because then that means it's working. Whether or not I don't know. But that's what I was, you know, like, okay, my body really responding to this in some way.

00:11:51:13 - 00:12:35:02
Unknown
So that's how that that's kind of maybe what I learned about resilience through this whole process. I love that. Yeah, I, I, I can relate to that a lot. That's kind of like that's how I kept myself grounded. I just kind of had faith in everything that I was consuming and doing. And, you know, it it was just I just wanted to continue to keep my body strong and just knew that just had faith that whatever I was taking or whatever they were giving me, or it was just helping to heal me and, you know, yeah, your body could take a break and drugs take over in your body.

00:12:35:05 - 00:13:13:03
Unknown
Take a break and rest. Do you? Absolutely. What advice do you have for other cervical cancer survivors facing recurrence or staying strong or positive during their journey? Well, one thing we touched on before that I would say is absolutely ask about clinical trials. You know, you and I just came back from the Society of Gynecologic Oncology Conference and, you know, we heard great things and saw that there are people were working on things for for cervical cancer and recurrences.

00:13:13:03 - 00:13:55:03
Unknown
So certainly ask about trials of them. So that that would be that. And then staying positive and hopefully it's something that you can just become and not force yourself to be. Absolutely. Can you share a moment that highlighted your inner strength and resilience during your battle with cervical with a cervical cancer recurrence? Well, I, I don't know that there was a single moment that I felt was being strong, but I'll tell you, you know, I can look back on what I've been through.

00:13:55:03 - 00:14:22:23
Unknown
And I think that was, you know, really tough. And a lot of times during treatment, if, say, you knew you were having eight rounds of chemo or whatever, you got a five, you could look back and say, okay, I did five, I know I can do three. So they're like that, that, that you, that, that helped me get through some of the like dread of having to do more of it.

00:14:23:02 - 00:14:54:09
Unknown
Yeah. Yeah. You can tap into a strength that you didn't realize you had. Yeah. I mean you're forced to it. You have children. I have children and mine were young. And so for me, I didn't I didn't really feel like it was an option. And I'm not that to make other people feel like they do. But in my head, I just I mean, my prayer was always, please let me live so I can see my children grow up and live happy, healthy, successful lives.

00:14:54:10 - 00:15:20:16
Unknown
That was my same prayer literally every single day. I mean, you know, Wow, that's beautiful Now. I mean, that's what got me through, you know? And I just that's all I wanted, you know, just to just to be here and see them grow. And mine were like in probably fourth, fifth and sixth grade at the time. So, you know, and honestly, that's kind of what kept me on my toes and and kept me healthy.

00:15:20:16 - 00:15:42:02
Unknown
You know, I just because I was always the parent that was at all the things and doing all that, all the stuff. And so I didn't want to stop that. And so growing on with big and I had on top of it and just kind of blend in with everybody else. And, you know, I showed up and it just kind of kept giving me the strength to keep showing up for myself.

00:15:42:02 - 00:16:12:21
Unknown
You know, it's fun to see my kids. They're 22 and 26 now. And I think someone the other day, I don't know that my children know of a mother without cancer like cancer has been part of their lives for, you know, 20 years now. So it's that and they don't know any different. So they've learned lessons that I could have never taught them otherwise.

00:16:12:23 - 00:16:36:09
Unknown
And hopefully they share those with other people in some way. And that's something that's really helped to through this process. You know, you do a lot of it, but it's trying to help others, you know, not necessarily thinking of me, but what can I do to help this person get through it or this process so that that's been a therapeutic thing for me.

00:16:36:11 - 00:17:00:11
Unknown
Yeah, me too. Me too. I, I didn't, I didn't really know how far I wanted to take it at first, and I was really, I don't know. I was just I just was really anxious about just sharing about myself and my journey. But once you see, you know, how impactful it can be to other people, it just kind of keeps giving me strength.

00:17:00:12 - 00:17:27:21
Unknown
It's kind of beautiful in a way. I mean, sometimes it gets a little overwhelming, but but I think of the fact that this is exactly what I needed when I was going through this. I mean, I was searching high and low, but just trying to find one person. And so now it's, you know, so the power of social media has made it a lot easier to connect with others.

00:17:27:23 - 00:17:49:23
Unknown
So I love that about it. So 20 years ago, when I was originally diagnosed, you know, it wasn't as, you know, a thing. And but my friend is an I. There are five of us who are really close. We were we were on Facebook and we were just really open about it. And I'm a firm believer in everyone needs to do it their own way.

00:17:49:23 - 00:18:12:13
Unknown
Sometimes when I very people would come up to me after and say, I've never told anyone, like my husband's the only person who knows and that's fine for them. But for me it was helpful to share. And I'm I support. We live in a wonderful community and I felt a lot of support through that. So, I mean, everyone has to figure out how they want to do it.

00:18:12:15 - 00:18:48:02
Unknown
And when I would have recurrences, it was it it was a little hard at times. I would see people in the grocery store and it would be awkward for them to ask or, you know, so it was. But I did find so much strength from people around me as well. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. I and yeah, I wasn't, I wasn't going to share anything when I was first diagnosed, but it kind of my I lost my job and my friend started a go fund me.

00:18:48:04 - 00:19:12:20
Unknown
And so I was just trying to just share a little bit of information at a time. But the more you know, the more sick I looked, you know, people were asking questions and, you know, then I would hear from people. This is before I even got into any sort of advocacy or anything like that. But, you know, like my my sister was just diagnosed with this and like, what do you suggest?

00:19:12:20 - 00:19:38:05
Unknown
And it just I don't know. It's it's important to when it when and if you're comfortable to to share in whatever capacity. And before I started sharing more, I was blogging. And that was just for me, honestly, just to write. But it's helpful to tell your story if you if you're comfortable because it might help you with. Exactly.

00:19:38:07 - 00:20:17:09
Unknown
Exactly. So how do you advocate for yourself and seek empowerment in the face of challenges related to cervical cancer recurrence? That's a mouthful. Yeah. As far as advocating for myself, you know, I think back to when I was originally diagnosed and my my first recurrence was probably the most significant. But I think back to that and, you know, making sure you call in, get the appointments when you want to get the appointments and all of that stuff, which sounds so ridiculous, but it's a lot of work to do that.

00:20:17:09 - 00:20:42:13
Unknown
And, you know, I used to share pristine classes and I would always say this is my now. And I don't even know if that's a word or with cancer, but this is this person's first time. And and I think it's hard to advocate for yourself because you don't really know what you're for. But if you've done something, ask the questions.

00:20:42:13 - 00:21:06:00
Unknown
And so that's been really important. And also them being able to, you know, through the past, I don't know, 12 years or so, I've been involved in different organizations and boards and whatever. So being able to give back and help others has helped me be stronger as well. Even just knowing information that I can share with other people.

00:21:06:01 - 00:21:31:19
Unknown
Absolutely, Absolutely. Yeah. I feel the same exact way. That's why I love going to the conferences because I learned so much and and you might not think it, you know, at the moment, obviously it doesn't pertain to your particular situation. But I you know, I was leading a support group the other night and a woman had mentioned something that I literally just learned about recently.

00:21:31:19 - 00:22:13:01
Unknown
And so it's it's really nice and empowering for me to be able to share that with you because it is when we have what resources or support systems have been instrumental in helping you navigate the complexities of cervical cancer recurrence? Well, I talked about my friends, so I think tips and people that you surround yourself with and are important, but there are really credible organizations like the Foundation or their website has incredible resources and different things on it that helps.

00:22:13:03 - 00:22:41:03
Unknown
But I mentioned when I started, Facebook wasn't huge, so weren't groups and everything, but now there are groups and sometimes those can be really helpful. Some people don't love to be on them because maybe it's too much information or that's not where they are. But there are so many women who do find support and strength through those organizations or, you know, or those groups of other women.

00:22:41:05 - 00:23:10:23
Unknown
Yeah, for sure. How did you start getting into to like reaching out to organization? And is there is there something that led you to reach out to them through advocacy or did you go through support? So I had mentioned my five friends in our videos. So when my first recurrence happened, we did a creating a5k event that took off and we didn't know it would become a charity, but it did become a charity.

00:23:10:23 - 00:23:40:05
Unknown
It was just overwhelming response. But through that, because I believed so much in research and science, we funded research grants through NGO and the Foundation for Women's Cancer and and doing those kinds of things. Then they knew that there was a patient out there who was willing to share their story. And also a doctor has said and you know, sadly, there aren't tons of it.

00:23:40:07 - 00:24:14:04
Unknown
I'm recurrent patients, so I'm, you know, and I did some blogging for M.D. Anderson. A lot of women say I saw you on M.D. Anderson's blog and things. So just through sharing my story and being able to be involved in organizations, I love him. That's amazing. What How has your perspective on resilience evolved since your first cancer diagnosis to facing recurrence?

00:24:14:08 - 00:24:37:19
Unknown
Well, I'm sure a lot of it is cancer. And, you know, there's in everything and and there's a healthy amount of aging that's happened, too. So, you know, I care about the things I care about and I don't care about the things I don't care about anymore. I'm more I feel more I feel stronger to be able to say yes and no.

00:24:37:19 - 00:25:05:13
Unknown
And I want to spend my time So I think that that's certainly as cliche as it is. That's a lesson that has taught me. it's totally I mean, I totally agree. It's probably one of my favorite lessons I've learned through my cancer journey. It cliche so much good has come out of it and I like theory D Yeah I know.

00:25:05:13 - 00:25:25:14
Unknown
I mean, at first when I was diagnosed, I was like, I kind of detested all the little cliche sayings. And then I was just like, Wait a minute, maybe a lot of things do happen for a reason, you know? And then I kind of started repeating them myself. And and I just over the years, I you know, I'll take the cliche sayings this simple.

00:25:25:20 - 00:25:57:08
Unknown
It does make sense that it has kind of unfolded. And then a more beautiful way than I could have ever expected. You know? I agree. Yep. What self-care practices have helped you stay resilient and empowered this during your time? This was a big once, so exercise has always been important to me. Well, I say from the time I was like late thirties, I I've never been an athlete.

00:25:57:08 - 00:26:31:23
Unknown
I exercise my family doesn't like an exercise family or anything like that. I walk and then I ran and during my first recurrence I continued to exercise and I realized how strong I felt as a person. And so I I've always done some sort of exercise through this whole process. My 2021 was a little bit harder, though, because I surgery and then I had asked and knew I couldn't as I mean, I lost £20.

00:26:31:23 - 00:26:58:11
Unknown
I was really sick and exercised. So once I started in a little weight and then I was I had the ileostomy reversed and I was on chemo, but I could be doing something. So I played a studio open near my house and I started because I knew I needed a thing and faithful to part of my schedule that B and I schedule other appointments around it.

00:26:58:11 - 00:27:21:06
Unknown
So so definitely the exercise because I feel like I, when I'm sitting there waiting for the doctor to come in and tell me how my what my scan looks like, I say things to myself like, Well, who did CrossFit this morning or Who is it this morning? You did? Yeah, but that's only going to help you. So. Exactly, exactly.

00:27:21:07 - 00:27:46:15
Unknown
I would say mostly just exercise and I do some meditation, but I'm not as good at that. Yeah, I know. I wish I was better at that too. I just. My mind is so busy. Yeah. but I try and. And I'm trying to get better about exercise. I mean, I'm. I'm active, but I don't. I want more, like, intentional time to to exercise.

00:27:46:15 - 00:28:17:02
Unknown
I need to set the time aside to do, like, an intentional exercise. But I'm active in the sense that, like, I'm not sedentary, you know, but I don't have but I love to do Pilates or something like that. But it's great for the body and the mind, definitely. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. can you share a moment of triumph or achievement that inspired you to keep pushing forward despite recurrence?

00:28:17:04 - 00:28:41:23
Unknown
I've never not felt like I would push forward or keep going, ever. You know, I remember seeing a woman in the. I was waiting for a scan or something and you just looked to is complete. You know, she looked really, really quick and I thought, like, I wonder if I'll ever get to that point. And not that she was there.

00:28:41:23 - 00:29:06:14
Unknown
I don't know. I didn't talk to her, but I just felt like she must be tired and tired of all of this. But I never I never had those feelings just because I, I don't know. I just naive or belief or whatever it is. I never I never felt that. So there was never a moment that I. I felt like I needed to push myself to keep moving.

00:29:06:16 - 00:29:47:01
Unknown
Yeah. Yeah. So you felt pretty hopeful and throughout, like you didn't have, like, a Yeah, it never got you down. It never got to the point where there were days where I would be upset about it and I was all cupcakes. But I mean, it was part I, I really let things take its course. You know, I would come home from and get in bed like I knew it was and I grew I have no apathy and I this that and the other thing like you know whatever I have stuff but I'll take all of that just to be here.

00:29:47:01 - 00:30:16:20
Unknown
Yeah yeah absolutely. I think I mean I just had and that I mean that was kind of what that was the initial shift for me, honestly. I mean, I, I was the last day that I was really heartbroken about my diagnosis was the same day that I decided to that it wasn't going to consume me. And it ended up being the most pivotal thing in my journey.

00:30:16:20 - 00:30:41:20
Unknown
I mean, I was obviously distraught the day that I found out that my cancer had spread and I cried my tears. And then I just I don't know, I just felt so empowered, you know, just like I found I was looking through studies and I found and I found one person who had had my same diagnosis excuse me.

00:30:41:21 - 00:31:06:02
Unknown
She went into remission and I was like, okay, as long as there's one I know there can be, you know? And that shifted everything for me. I just I looked at myself like, I if there's somebody else who can do it, I can do it too. And it really just made all the difference. Yeah. Gives you hope. Definitely.

00:31:06:04 - 00:31:40:11
Unknown
Yeah. Can I ask this quite what message of hope and empowerment would you like to share with other survivors navigating the complexities of a recurrence when thing that I feel strongly about and I try to share with others is that you're in charge of the cancer. Don't give power or don't that power to can't dictate it. You are in practice.

00:31:40:13 - 00:32:07:09
Unknown
for years. So that's generally what I try to tell people, because that's something that I would think about that in the waiting rooms. You know, I am the boss here, so. Right. And it may be the boss and make you feel like crap. Plenty. But I mean, you're still the boss, so you know, when you're going to get up and walk around the block if you're going to do that.

00:32:07:09 - 00:32:34:07
Unknown
So. Yeah. Yeah. And how do you you know, I, I have a good friend who has has been dealing with, you know, her diagnosis for a long time and and, and it's, it, it's hard, it's daunting. You know, you, you're looking for good news and and the good news hasn't quite come yet. How would you how would you navigate that?

00:32:34:07 - 00:33:01:14
Unknown
How do you how can you stay strong after so many years? You know, like at what point does it become just too much, you know? Yeah. For me, I never hit that point, but I always found strength in wanting more time and more more of what my children would be doing. You know, my many of my friends were having grandchildren and there were that.

00:33:01:14 - 00:33:30:03
Unknown
I wonder if I'll ever be a grandmother, you know, I mean, I don't want to be anytime soon. Okay. And thing. But yeah, but so those kinds of things kept me going and I just wanted more out of life. And, and so there were times that everyone around me was worried and probably thought I wasn't going to live.

00:33:30:05 - 00:34:03:10
Unknown
Yeah, but, you know, you never told me then. But they'll tell me afterwards, like, yeah, I was. And so I need to me because I never felt it, but there were, there were people around me that that thought this is not good. Yeah, yeah yeah yeah No I know I same I Yeah well I mean let's see I was told my cancer spread in November of 2016, and in April of 2017 I bought a house so everybody was like, Who would that be doing this?

00:34:03:10 - 00:34:47:04
Unknown
Like, I'm fine, you know, I'm going to be all right. And I just I just knew it. I felt it. And I didn't really give my self a chance to think otherwise. And and that's what drove me, you know, even on the worst days. Yeah. Sometimes it's not an option, you know, as a mom. And I think that's probably something women, mothers, parents deal with, you know, like it's not but just on the flip side of that, something that I, I feel sensitive to is the women who have had cervical cancer who cannot build learning.

00:34:47:06 - 00:35:18:15
Unknown
I have children. And then I had my first diagnosis. It did. And, you know, people would say, well, you have two beautiful children, whatever. And I said, you know, but I didn't. Emily was complete. I'm sorry. I don't know how to do it. It's a back story. My life. So I do that and I love I apologize, everyone.

00:35:18:17 - 00:35:45:08
Unknown
No, no, no. It's okay. Yeah, fine. So I think that that's it's important, you know, for so many women who who do have this cancer, don't have a choice and have not made the choice to not have children, but but won't be happy. And I think that's devastating and probably needs to be acknowledged. And even that wasn't that wasn't the case for you or I.

00:35:45:08 - 00:36:21:18
Unknown
But that that's a huge thing for people with this diagnosis. I know I know. Probably all diagnosed with cancer. So that's why I'm saying that's what I know. Yeah, it's it's, it's, it. And, you know, I didn't even bring it up when I was diagnosed. I mean, I didn't it almost kind of felt selfish that I felt I felt, you know, just kind of heartbroken for anybody else because I didn't I didn't ask that question about fertility or anything, just because I did already have my children.

00:36:21:18 - 00:36:44:09
Unknown
But and that's that you know, that's one of the reasons I got into advocacy, honestly, because some of these questions are not brought up. And then you're kind of just you're kind of flabbergasted when you find out that your choice of fertility, you know, your choice of ever having children, a child has been taken away. And so I encourage people to ask those questions.

00:36:44:09 - 00:37:10:15
Unknown
I didn't think to ask those questions. One, I did and 20 years ago, the doctor that I had at the time, which is not the doctor, I have said, don't even worry about that. You know, we won't worry about that in my ovaries. But it wasn't like they were going to be any use after that. So. Right. Yeah, I got them.

00:37:10:17 - 00:37:50:10
Unknown
Yeah. He didn't care. So. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've done they just don't, don't do anything and, but anyways so I guess we're at the end of our questions. I, Do we have any other questions in the chat. Nope. Cool. We got through all of our questions tonight, which is wonderful, is there anything else you want to share in regards to your journey and recurrence or anything?

00:37:50:11 - 00:38:20:21
Unknown
You know, I really. I feel so healthy now. So I would it would be a shock to me if, if my cancer came back up. But I do feel so hopeful about being on the KEYTRUDA and even going, So you're on it for two years. I've had a port since 2000, 18 and two years. You know, my doctor said to me, I know you, Linda, and you're going to ask me to stay on it longer and so I've I've actually been thinking about that.

00:38:20:21 - 00:38:48:21
Unknown
And I think if I I'm constantly saying I think I'm done with I think I'm done with it. So I think when it's time I'm going to not ask her to extend it. And with my port, I love my port. I, I won't get rid of it right away. But yeah, funny, Rob and I talked about it recently and I said, you know, maybe I wait a year and then I caught.

00:38:49:02 - 00:39:21:22
Unknown
So I really feel like that's I feel so hopeful for my future. And I hope that anyone listening feels like they can make it through a recurrence or two or three, you know, So don't give up your power. You truly this well, that's beautiful advice and that's I think that's the best thing we can end on tonight. I'm really grateful for you joining us.

00:39:21:23 - 00:39:40:17
Unknown
You're amazing. I'm just. And all of you and and all that you do. And so I'm really grateful that you were on here tonight with us. Thank you. It's an honor to be here. And I hope that you and I together have been able to help others. And the percent. Yeah, we still got work to do. That's right.

00:39:40:18 - 00:40:05:12
Unknown
That's right. Thank you for joining us, Linda. Thank you all for participating and submitting your questions. Be sure to check out our upcoming upcoming educational programs and support groups. They are pinned to the chat and follow us on social media. This concludes our cervical chat. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Bye. Bye. Bye.